I realized that home is not necessarily where my love is. My love is here but I do not feel at home here. I find it very difficult to find friends in the Netherlands, even though I speak the language and can adapt to my surroundings. People seem to have not really time for friendships; life here is so time consuming that in the end of the day everyone seems happy to have some hours of sleep. And I can understand that, it is the same for me.
I realized that for me this way of living, this way of interacting with each other is not making me happy. And it took me quite a while.
If I would have at least have my family around me it would maybe be acceptable. But seeing them twice a year for a short week is just not enough for me.
Now I have to find a solution how to deal with the situation and take action. And this will be a move to my home country for me and my darling.
I have had a good time here in the Netherlands, but I feel that it is difficult to grow happy memories....